Wednesday, July 22, 2009

{fOrEvEr In OuR hEaRtS}

So I really haven't been laying around twittling my thumbs, and looking for something to do! Really! In between still getting the privilege of making memory boxes for several families, I have also been teaming up with some amazingly, selfless people that are reaching well out of their way to see to it that families are given a stage to love, celebrate, and share their babies that now live in Heaven.
This is the second year that I have been blessed to be a part of
Forever in Our Hearts Remembrance Walk. All to honor a baby that went Home well before expected. Last years family was poignant because they were the first "official" family that I was given the call to serve with a box. Sigh....I can remember walking into that hospital room as clearly as if it were just yesterday that I was there. This year, two sweet babies will be honored. And both families have graciously decided that they desire for any/all money raised to go to yours truly,
The Greatest Blessing.


Thank you families.

Thank you God.

I am blessed beyond words....and man does it suck to know that none of this current blessing would be here had I not had a baby boy go Home before me....but wow, I wouldn't trade it.
How can you say that you might ask?
I have this amazing ministry that fills me beyond expectation! I have a purpose and I KNOW that I have been a small part of contributing to eternal ramifications in a positive light. And I STILL will get to be with my baby boy! For eternity!
It's a win win! : )
I am humbled by the love and generosity God has imposed on the hearts of all these amazing people!

If you can attend, please do! Spread the word. Share this on Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, email, phone calls, coffee break, Morris code....WHATEVER! If you can't be there, please get on your knees for the event. Pray for the families to receive healing, love and an opportunity to be proud of their boys. But also that this ministry would get recognition and would glorify Jesus infinitely!
My utmost aim in all I do with this ministry!
God is SO good! Thank you so!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

{dEaR mAcSeN}

Regardless of the wiring God has given me, (to be an encourager I mean: I still have suckage moments! Is that a word? Well it is now!)

I have a son you know .

Just one, and his name is Macsen Danforth.

He looks like both of his sisters really. He has Mia's face shape. Her eyebrows and lips. But he has Maizy's head shape, and her nose and cheeks. He looks alot like his daddy.....very striking and handsome. He might have actually been a loud mouth like his mama! lol- we'll see....

Holy wow do I miss him......

Dear Macsen,
Little baby, there is so much to tell, where do I begin, except with....WOWZERS, I LOVE YOU!
You are missed beyond actual words, but I promise when I see you I will show you with my hugs and kisses. I am excited and tired just thinking about it. I'de do that all now if I could!

Macsen, mommy and daddy have made so many mistakes. We haven't always loved God more then other things. We haven't always looked to Him for our comfort and help as we should. I know it is difficult for you to understand that, because He, is all you have known. That actually is something I am quite envious of. You truly are missing nothing down here my boy. And I am sure you are at perfect peace knowing that one day you will be with all of those that love you here and long to know you so much more. God is so good about telling us His promises. I need to remember that on days like today. Days like this where I long so much to hold your strong,all boy body. To feel you pull my hair and slobber all over my cheek. Nothing could be less glamorous and yet so appealing all in one.

But...I do trust God. That is one thing the enemy was counting against. I trust Him, and further more- I embrace His plan for me all the more! That not only would I come to know Him more clearly, but that I would be used to glorify Him more magnificently! More freakishly, really!

You skipping this place has a whole lot more good coming from it then not! It's me that needs to just get over it, and see it through the Father's eyes. And He is gentle....knowing too clearly, just what a heartache it is....but we want what is best for THE KINGDOM. For the glory of this KING we serve. Let how I handle this be an act of worship, Lord!

Mommy and daddy, as you know have been struggling to get to this place. We have turned against each other at times and looked at one another as enemies, rather then fellow soldiers. That time is behind us. Your prayers have paid off my sweet, Saint son. Intercession with King Jesus has it's rewards, eh?! :) God has reached into daddy's heart and begun to cleanse it. To remove his spiritual fog from his eyes and reveal His goodness, truth, hope, love, and REDEMPTION! The battle is not yet through. Satan has changed his tactics and is calling on more forces. But so is our God. And greater is He that is in us then he that is in the world!

Not one day goes by that your name is not said. That you are not thought of. That we do not long to hold and love on the sweetest little boy these arms will ever hold. You are our son. You are your sisters brother. PERIOD. Here. Or there.

Sing loud sweet little man! Keep are the mightiest soldier I have ever known, and mommy loves you. Listen to your Abba daddy.....Holy Spirit, help us to listen and hear too.

We love you and have seared you in our hearts where you will dwell until we meet you face to face.....what a sweet day that will be! sigh...... And so I press on toward the goal........

I love you endlessly ~Mommy

What a beautiful boy you are.....
if I do say so myself! : ) All boy.
My little bruiser.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

{eYeS oPeN}

I attended a service tonight at a church I do not normally attend. It was such a breathe of fresh air. Have you ever been in a service/moment/prayer/worship where the tears just flow. There isn't anything out of sight said or done, it is simply that the Holy Spirit is there and He is there in ALL of His greatness and love?! If you have, then you know already, without having been there, what this service was like for me tonight. Maybe it's just where I'm at right now in my walk with the Lord. He is so much more awesome, real, great, loving, forgiving, all-knowing, powerful, strong, in charge, mighty, royal, tender, merciful, glorious, endearing, empowering, majestic, magnificent, magnetic, intense, suffocating, irresistible, stilling, wise, lovely, and beautiful then I have ever known Him to be. And this is just the beginning of what it is that He is trying to show me. The amazing truth to all of that profound realization, is that I am positive that I would not have discovered all of these attributes, characteristics and truths about our God had I (are you ready for this) -not had my baby boy born asleep.

My eyes were opened because He chose for me to see Macsen's eyes closed....only to be seen open in paradise.

Humbling truth. But truth.

My son is in my heart. He is in the breeze. He is in the belly laughter that trails down the steps in my home from my daughters. He is in every embrace that my husband and I have.He is in every stroke of the brush that I take as I paint another box for a family facing this new challenging journey of infant loss. He is with his family every time we gather together. (Like in this picture which is one of many in this road of restoration for my husband and I and this family that Satan will not win. Hallelujah! Praise you Jesus! But notice too in the pic, where I keep my Macsen always....his picture around my neck. I am so proud of that little man! I HAVE to see him regularly!) He is in the tears that I shed every time I feel the Holy Spirit wooing me and those I love as we bend our knees in adoration to this King. This King that made it possible that good-bye is not good-bye, but instead, until we meet again....
The same King that my son is worshipping in this very moment. And in this one. And this. And this. And....

I would like to encourage anyone reading this to remember that any trial you have had to face- Any loss you are having to endure- Any struggle you are wrestling with- Any place you are fighting to leave......HE LOVES YOU. HE IS WITH YOU. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU. NEVER!

Let's wake up people! wake up! He is there and He so desires for us to grab His capable hand...and fly!!!!!!!!!!

Trials are not punishment. They are training. Training to build our spiritual muscles and to build our most valued weapon: OUR FAITH!

p.s the song playing may or may not jive with this post...but it certainly jives with all of us wayward spirits that too often can stray from our God! My husband loves this song. He seems to really identify with it. I certainly do! His mercy is beyond amazing. I have 2 words for you:



Wednesday, July 8, 2009


* Let me first say....this song may or may not connect with you as it does me in connection with this post. That's ok....I like it. This song has much meaning to me.
I have been grieving with many others (as bazaar as that may seem to you, about Michael Jackson this week. I plan to post on it in the coming days, Reflecting with God currently about it looking though. )
This is a quick update. God is up to much in my personal walk with Him, and in my almost deceased marriage. the battle is far from over. in fact, now that we have turned the dial up on the enemy, he is turning it up on us. please keep interceding with me. He is a liar and a vicious deceiver at that. I need wisdom, faith and diligence and my husband needs hope, self control, and A SUFFOCATING ENCOUNTER WITH THE LIVING GOD TO BRING HIM TO HIS KNEES IN HUMILITY AND LOVE FOR THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO HIM. JESUS! (I of course am in second place!: ) lol)

I want to leave you with a few tid bits God has been making very clear to me this week. Forgive me that they may come across a bit sarcastic, I do that as a kick in the pants to myself. When will I wake up to his BIGGNESS? Good question.....

1. I am God. I have ALL things in my hands and control.

You are you and have not a clue what I am up to. (I know....extremely theological, huh?!lol)

2. I am God. I have given ALL authority to YOU! Not just to your pastor. Not just your Holy friend from Bible study. YOU!

He is pretty clear about. If you don't believe your bible. TRUTH!



Wednesday, July 1, 2009

{aLl AuThOrItY}

Is anyone out there alive and ready for some serious GOD?!

I don't mean the God that we rattle off rote prayers to, prayers that for the most part are us trying to convince ourselves of what it is we are coming to the Father in need of. I don't mean the God that we read about in the old and new testament and say, "Whew! That was awesome! How cool it is that Jesus healed that guy. I sure can't wait till He comes back!" HELLO! I can't wait till He gets back either, but why do we forget that it is HIM that told us to pray like this:
On earth as it is in Heaven! Is there any unhealed people in Heaven people?
Are there any hurting hearts in Heaven as there are on earth? Is there bondage in heaven I ask? NO. Typical argument: "Well, this is a fallen world. It effects all areas of life." True, BUT, as Christians, were we not given ALL AUTHORITY OVER OUR ENEMY?


-LUKE 9:1-2


-LUKE 10:19

Seems pretty clear to me, so why in the world have I been living
so far under that level of position?!*?!!?

I have no idea. But guess what?


Jesus....YOU are KING! I am your daughter, and I reign on high with You! Open our spiritual eyes to the place you have given us here and in Heaven, our true Home! Thank you that you already won us the victory, and that You are right now interceding on behalf of each of us- me writing, those reading and the many that we love and are burdened for or have yet to know! Your aim is for ALL to be saved & live in FREEDOM and to spend eternity with You. Pour out Your spirit of revelation, encouragement, deliverance, freedom, love, power, authority, and victory for your children! We're in a's time to STAND UP!!!!!!!!! Break through is needed Jesus and so desperately desired! Praise be to You Jesus, the Most High! You are worthy! Equip us for the battle! Satan may have come to kill, steal, and destroy....but he will never take OUR FREEDOM!


BTW the speech playing from Braveheart is well written and is more prophetic then most know. Listen to the words from a spiritual set of ears. We do not wage war as the world does....but we are in a war! Fight for freedom!